Mike Slickster (slicker) wrote,
Mike Slickster

Today's Tirade: Ten Things That Make Me Go, "WTF?"

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1. Why is it when my back needs scratching urgently, the itch is in the spot where I'd have to be a double-jointed contortionist to reach it without grabbing a coat hanger, or other long, pointed objects to satisfy the persistent urge?

2. Normally I save my work regularly while creating a labor-intensive, graphic image in Photoshop; piecing together an extensive video, or when writing a long-winded tirade, article, or chapter to my latest novel. Why is it the one time I forget to do so, my computer crashes and I lose everything?

3. While getting into a vehicle and glancing out into the main thoroughfare to see little—if any—traffic passing by, guaranteed I'll find a line of cars and trucks a mile long when proceeding to leave the property, with no one giving in an inch to let me get out.

4. Pulling on the strip where it's marked "Open Here," and snapping off the appendage immediately after initiating the action.

5. Likewise, when opening box tops with the convenient tuck-in tabs to place into its corresponding slot for closing afterward, I inadvertently tear the slot's side in half due to faulty packaging no matter how careful I am, preventing the carton from fastening properly.

6. Ripping the Scotch Tape off before reaching the dispenser's cutter and losing the tapered end on the roll inside.

7. Fat-thumb Syndrome when texting from my phone, or leaving on the auto-correct and letting something unintentionally absurd fly off with the message.

8. Taking an extraordinary or unique photo and posting it on social media, putting together a stellar video and uploading it on Youtube; making a witty statement on Twitter and Facebook, or writing an excellent blog entry; and yet nobody makes a kind remark, or even a cutting comment about it while I see second-rate and mediocre offerings get the utmost praise.

9. Accidentally getting into the exact-change lane of a tollbooth, thinking I had the correct amount and finding out I didn't.

10. Running into the only public loo when having to defecate and finding no toilet paper is available (I know, too much information).

Join me for my next tirade when I'll be discussing overused words and phrases on Twitter.
Tags: double-jointed contortionist, facebook, social media, today's tirade, twitter, wtf, youtube
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